Goal-Setting

Hey there! There’s an importance of setting and obtaining goals in every facet of your life. I know that many people automatically think of careers when goal-setting is broached. Well, that is only one aspect and should be a topic implemented regularly to ensure that you are not only living your best life, but also attempting it. It does not have to be such a hardship that brings anxiety based on the work that presupposes it. Anything worth having is worth working hard for, right? ? So, let’s go. ?‍♀️

What do you want to achieve? Are you content with where you are or do you look at your life and feel unfulfilled with a desire to procure something more? I hear people saying “goals” in response to other people’s lives. As a therapist, I ponder ? what the respondent is actually thinking ? at the time when they state that word in reference to an image. Is that actually a goal that they truly have or is it something that is stated because it looks aesthetically pleasing? It’s easy to desire what others have and attempt to fulfill that level of success and call it a goal. ?‍♀️ However, let’s not forget that success is always going to be subjective. What’s considered successful to one may not weigh the same to someone else. Success does not always equal monetary ? gain. For some, that is a huge part of it, but there is so much more. For those individuals who look at “successful marriages” and state “goals” referring to the outside image the couple portrays, fail to recognize everything that glitters is not gold ? and it is also subjective.

Society shapes our worldview and ideals of what is acceptable and worthy of achieving. How would this idea look to you if you took the time to truly travel within yourself to discover what your individual goals are? The thought of actually formulating your own path ?‍♀️ and disregarding what others expect or think not only sets you apart from the masses, but also makes you a trailblazer! ? You’re really in a category of a select few when you live life out loud with your own rules and goals. How do I develop this mindset? ? That part is actually easy. Take the time to get to know who you truly are and once you achieve that level of assuredness, live unapologetically as YOU.

Where do I start?

You start with introspection. There’s always internal work ? to be done. After continued self-exploration, you will determine that some of the goals that you desire may need an enhancement. Others may need to be removed completely and innovative ones should sprout in their place. Whatever the goal, whether it’s professional or personal, can be attained if the effort is asserted. ? I always tell my clients the importance of setting mini-goals with rewarding yourself along the way. It can be extremely overwhelming to your psyche to just list a massive goal, such as “start a new career”. That goal in itself has to be broken down into mini-achievements to keep you pushing forward to getting there. There will be multiple steps or mini-goals that have to be achieved before you get there, i.e., research programs, apply for acceptance, register for certification class, take national exam, complete internship, just to name a few examples. After you have listed all of the steps to get there, check them off as you complete them and have a small personal celebration each time to keep your spirits and mojo positive. You are your number one cheerleader-? ENCOURAGE SELF!

Once the goals are fulfilled, ✅ you fully understand the importance of living out loud and remaining unapologetically you. ? You’ve worked diligently to set and achieve your goals and no one can take those accomplishments from you. NO ONE. Incontinently, you come into yourself, further adapting to the ideals that your goals, your life, your existence is all YOU. You owe no one an explanation of being YOU. Society is ever-changing, but you are also who you are and allowed to be as fluid as you like, without a thought to who likes it or not. ?‍♀️ It’s YOUR life. You only get one! ☝️ ? So, LIVE IT, SET YOUR OWN GOALS, and ACHIEVE THEM!

Sending you ? and ?,

CJ

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***I hope any and everything that I post on my blog helps you and enhances your life in many positive ways. In the event that you need mental help, please contact a local therapist in your area; however, if you are in need of immediate assistance for an emergency, please dial 911.

36 thoughts on “Goal-Setting”

  1. Chris H.

    Hi Dr. CJ nice post and no matter what you’re right, setting professional and personal goals are essential. And even the tiny baby steps count. I finished undergrad and grad a little later in my life but all that matters is I took the necessary steps and feel accomplished and have a achieved those milestones in my life. But even in the midst of those accomplishments, setting goals to become a better you is very important.

    1. cjmadry Post author

      Hi Chris!

      You’re a go getter and an over-achiever, which is why you are determined to succeed in your life’s choices. Failure is not an option and I am happy for you that you know this about yourself. Keep shining. Blessings, CJ

  2. Dawn

    Living out loud is a daily task for some of us but i try my hardest. You always tell me to, “take things one day at a time” as opposed to letting my Gemini ways force me to look too far ahead. That’s been a helpful tool in helping me living better and setting goals that actually work. Thanks CJ! You’re the best!

  3. KeliS.

    CJ,
    Hot woman! Real good message. I live for me and I enjoy it. No worries at all for me. People can kiss my shoe! Can you hear that in my voice?

  5. Scarlett Z.

    You always tell me the importance of setting minigoals and celebrating and I do that. This put things into perspective for me because when I ask myself if certain decisions that I made are for me, I wonder. I wonder if I would have decided to go into the field that I did if it wasnt an acceptable field judged by society or if I would have chosen something else. Everything that we do is based on an ideal of what would be acceptable. Is it pleasing to the world or is it going to make people look at us sideways. I always set those mini goals and the big goals too but they are going to be a little different now as I ask myself the hard questions if its for me or for someone else. This one puts a lot on your heart and mind and soul and gut punching.

  6. Stephanie P.

    I am printing this out so that it helps me when I doubt myself and need to make changes and achieve goals. I always print your stuff, but this one is so on time with me trying to start my business and make some moves. I am grateful for you sharing this. Thank you so much CJ! ?

  7. Saivon P.

    My moma always told me this and God rest her soul, I can hear her voice this. It is never good for anyone to live for others and very important to know how special life is. Once you acknowledge your life as being special and one of a kind then you know you can be independent and live for yourself. It does make you happier because I have lived for others so much in the beginning of my life and decided it is not their live now that I am a grown man.

  8. Missy F

    I like this subject and am truly encouraged to make some changes without worrying about what people think of me.

  10. AhelaniP

    Hi CJ!
    This stepped on my toes but I like when it does because as you said if it does not, you cant get growth from it. Growth is uncomfortable. So, I like it. I can adapt this into my life especially with 2020 being this crazy year.

  12. Nikki S.

    Hey CJ,

    I will always live my own life. I just try to get my close friends and family to do the same so they dont focus on me. If you focus on yourself you wont even care about what I am doing. lol

  14. Rebecca S.

    Hi CJ,
    I know you are so busy but I need you to write a blog every week, please! I need this kind of support and encouragement and look for it. I was so happy that you posted you had a new one. I live all of this one. I have a tendency to want to please others and I feel I can try to live out loud and be myself.

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