You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to know that many people that you know, including yourself, are feeling lost in translation. Maybe a traumatic event placed you in this space or maybe you just haven’t recognized yourself since the pandemic of our generation. Whatever it is, it’s a very uneasy feeling that continually asks you if this is all there is for your life and if you should you just chalk it up and come to terms with it.
I don’t have all of the answers but I have a few nuggets of wisdom to share to help you out of this disparaging space of doom. If you follow me anywhere on social media, this blogspace or invested in my first book(Bookbaby or Amazon), you know the importance of getting to your peace and ensuring your support circle is intact. What does that look like for you? Stop and think about who makes up your support circle and if they are worthy to be acknowledged as being a part of your circle. You have control of this circle because it is carefully formulated by you to add and subtract on an ongoing basis.
Now that you have identified these important folks in your life, ask yourself are you receiving the support from them to push through to the next level when you’re incapable of doing it your own? Everyone experiences times when you need an outside source to advocate for you and your needs because you cannot do it on your own. That extra push of encouragement can be the difference of failure and success, if you utilize it properly. You are not asking for a handout; however, you are requesting a “handup”.
How does having the right support circle in place get you out of the “depression rut” or “stuckdom”? Well, first and foremost, it demonstrates to you that you are seen. Someone sees you and you are not alone. Knowing that you are not alone in this dark space because someone cares or because you become aware that others are experiencing it as well, may help you to see that there is sunshine peeking behind the dark clouds.
It’s okay to ask for help. You are not God with all the answers; but, you are a human who falls and deserves grace in the midst of the storms. Trying to do it all on your own when help is available is never the answer and can add to the severity of the situation(s). Sometimes that plate that you have designed for order in your life becomes so complex that you’re no longer aware of what’s on it. All those areas of your life become overwhelming and overlooked; therefore, here you are in the throes of “stuckdom” .
Gone are the days when men and women are seen as being weak because they can’t handle the stressors of life. Therapy has become more and more accepted without all of the taboo associated with it. Without even giving you the statistics on it, I am aware just by the ongoing influx of inquiries that I receive as well as my colleagues. The world is reaching out for help and the mental health profession is busier than ever assisting our brothers and sisters on this journey of life.
You may not need a therapist and that is just fine, but you do need a support circle. You can not do this life alone without anyone in your corner. We’re relational beings and need those connections. There are so many stress-related illnesses that could be prevented if a plan of action, which emphasizes hope is implemented. This is not a one size fits all solution, but certain components could be the start for everyone in need.
- Get your support circle in check. Clean it up regularly and know that you are in control of who is a part of your life. If the relationship is not mutually beneficial or symbiotic- cut it. It’s toxic. Add and delete to it accordingly.
- Self-care is vital. Find what works for you to restore your peace and get to your center. Whatever that looks like for you is perfectly fine, if it is healthy and brings fulfillment to you.
- Eat right and Exercise. These components are a part of self-care but are non-negotiable. Self-care techniques for everyone are subjective but exercise in some form and eating better are always objective. What you put into your body impacts your overall health including mental and emotional health.
- Focus on your spirituality. I know not everyone is spiritual or religious and if that does not apply to you- do you- however, everyone else strive to have a more spiritual connection with God and pray. Whatever that looks like for you- elevate on this level. You will be surprised how much it helps.
- Count your blessings. There is always so much to be grateful for even when you are going through it. Focus on what’s going right and be appreciative. Start your morning with gratitude by being thankful and prayerful.
- Set a simple goal for yourself. Nothing big. Something measurable that you can achieve and once you achieve it, set the next one, and so forth. One day at a time will get you moving towards the light and further away from the “stuckness” or funk you’re in.
- Take a break from social media. Social media is draining and depressing for many. There are so many images that are seen as ideal, but they are unrealistic. Everyone goes through problems- even the influencer and celebrity that make life look easy. If you redirect that same amount of time you use daily scrolling on social media to work on yourself- you’d achieve many goals for yourself.
- Stop telling everybody what you’re doing. Everyone is not happy for you. Even family or long term “friends”. Sometimes when people do not get the support they desire, they stop striving towards their goals. Move in silence.
- If you did it before- you can do it again. That’s right. Remember those times when you didn’t feel like this and had more hope? It can return. You are “going through” something- which means you can and will come out on the other side of it.
- You are either in a storm, coming out of a storm, or going into another storm. Life “lifes”. We can’t control many things that happen, but we can control how we react to them. Remember your circumstances do not define your character. They are not you, so practice steps 1-9 above, in order to not be a victim of your circumstances.
I wish you relief and restored hope for your life because you deserve to move past whatever is impeding your progress.
Love and Light,
CJ
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***I hope any and everything that I post on my blog helps you and enhances your life in many positive ways. In the event that you need mental help, please contact a local therapist in your area; however, if you are in need of immediate assistance for an emergency, please dial 911.